Ugh Life sucks

Today I am so frustrated....

Well I talked to the adoption lady and it was going well till I told her I was overweight, then she went off about it are you kidding me???? You are worried that I'm over weight but want a child even with Autism.... I feel like I have been slapped in the face, fine I won't eat ever again... I will lost weight then I will get a kid right away I doubt it. I have lots of strength's and they may look right past that.

Oh she also said if we are going to do clomid then she won't come do the home study because if we got pregnant it would be a waste of time. So now I have to decide if I want to adopt or to do clomid ugh life sucks!

I just wish I could POAS on friday and find a BFP, yeah right!

God please help me I feel so empty I want a child to fill that need that I have. Oh God please help us figure out what to do, clomid or adoption Lord...

Oh yeah I am on day 3 of no pop and its killing me man! My head is pounding.... I can do it! I even went out for lunch oh each of the 3 days and had water...